26 May 2016

New York’s a Whole Other World

I don’t understand people from New York. Here’s an example. I know a woman from New York. She’s lived in Phoenix about seven years. She wants desperately to go back to New York. The other day, I asked her why she hated Phoenix so much.

Her: I can count on one hand the number of five-star chefs in Phoenix.

Me (staring at her incredulously): I don’t know of anyone in Phoenix who cares whether a restaurant has a five-star chef. You can get great food at a restaurant that does not have a five star chef.

Her: I just bought my [seven-year-old] daughter a bathing suit that has a pattern that is a fake Pucci design.

Me: Okeh.

Her: My daughter doesn’t know it’s a fake Pucci. She doesn’t know the difference between a real Pucci design and a fake one.

Me (staring at her incredulously): I doubt any seven-year old knows the difference between a real Pucci and a fake Pucci.

Her: In New York they do.

Me (staring at her incredulously)

Her: New York has a lot more museums that Phoenix does.

Me: True, but how many times a year would you go to a museum -- five? ten? Even if you go to a museum once a month, you wouldn’t go more than twelve times a year. For all of the money you save not living in New York, you could fly there once a month and stay a couple days and go to a couple museums. Plus, you could fly to Los Angeles or San Francisco and see the museums there.

Like I said, I don’t understand people from New York.

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